The time of our lives

Friday, Fridayyyy! Thank you to “Friday” mastermind Rebecca Black for creating the most unforgettable musical moment of the millennial era. 😉 Hard to believe it’s been over a decade since that song hit our iPod Nanos. Time flies.

Speaking of time…raise your hand if you spend your days wondering where the time went or wishing you had another hour or two to accomplish it all. That’s me. So in today’s issue, we’re answering your questions about time: making it count, using it wisely, and knowing when it’s right.

P.S. For the sake of time, you should have this read in about 3-5 minutes.

—Lindsay

More from Rachel: I love my babies beyond words but also feel very unaccomplished and like I'm not contributing to my family financially. Before my kids I had 2-3 jobs, making good money, and always pushing myself on goals. Now I feel like I never have time for anything but keeping these little ones happy and fed.

Being a parent is one of the hardest, most rewarding jobs on Earth. But for stay-at-home moms, it can feel like there’s never a break from the hardest, most rewarding job on Earth. I’ve been there and I know what a mind trip it can be. So…

Give yourself permission

We often think of ourselves as who we used to be—maybe we had a successful full-time career, led a volunteer organization, or liked to stay in bed until noon on Sundays. Those were the days. It’s normal to mourn that season of life and the person you were during it (and before kids). Give yourself permission to feel that nostalgia.

And when you’re ready? Recognize—although it’s tough to see when you’re knee-deep in dirty diapers—that the woman you are now has blossomed and evolved so much from the experience of motherhood. You are the sum of many different chapters and your story is still being written.

Seek support

Let’s all say it on the count of three: It’s okay to ask for help. Express the need for time to yourself daily, weekly, or monthly from your partner, a parent, a caregiver, or a neighbor. Trade “time off” with a mom friend in your life if you need to.

Shawn shared that she takes at least 5–10 minutes each morning to make hot coffee, and in her perfect dreamworld, she’d also enjoy a 45-minute morning workout, three times per week, solo. She emphasized the importance of keeping an open line of communication between her and Andrew because they know that taking care of themselves means being a better parent and spouse.

A guaranteed time for you means some relief (and time to do what you want to do) is around the corner. Take what you need: a nap, a jam session for a home project, a trip out of your house to see a friend, a class. Anything!

Remember, it is not selfish to prioritize ourselves, even though it can feel that way.

There may never be a right time to have kids. Of course, it helps to have your finances, home, and general attitude in a good place before making the commitment, but ask anyone who’s done it—it’s rare to feel that the timing is perfect to welcome a child into your world. The prevailing logic? You might not have everything checked off your list…but you’ll figure it out.

Shawn agreed. “You’re always going to have doubts and be scared or uncertain,” she said. “The idea of becoming a mom started to pull at my heart, which kind of led us down that road.”

If you are a lists person though, you might enjoy this all-logic chart from Time Magazine that helps get facts out of your head and onto paper.

Submit a question to be featured in a future Q&A here.

Some tips, tricks, and notes below.

Pureed parade. The FM tribe has spoken. The best way to sneak veggies into your kids’ meals is pureeing the heck out of them with things they already like! Here are a few favorites from the inbox:

• “Spinach! Seriously so nutritious and easy to hide in stuff. Best way for little kiddos is to chop it finely and add it to pasta sauce. Run your pasta sauce with added veggies through the blender!” —Dona

• “Veggie hack: Make fun kid approved green meatballs using ground chicken and add a ton of fresh puréed spinach! I use this recipe + spinach!” —Madison

• “Two of my favorite ways of getting my picky 2-year-old to eat veggies is by juicing and smoothies. We juiced kale and carrots with apples and oranges and he kept wanting more juice. Two of my favorite veggies to add to smoothies are spinach and riced cauliflower. It’s so good for you and there is practically no taste!” —Cortni

A health prodigy in the making. Meet Maria Balhara, 16-year-old scientist researching the links between potential “gateway foods” and health. Her research is getting worldwide attention, and her findings shine light on how to help kids and teenagers spend less time eating processed foods.

You guys are the best. We so appreciate your stories, tips, and expertise in the FamilyMade inbox. We’ll see you next week!